Working with the spirit

It is so easy for us to work with our minds, a bit hard to work with our hearts totally and we find it completely incomprehensible to work with our spirit- mainly because it requires a different mi…

Source: Working with the spirit


Working with the spirit

It is so easy for us to work with our minds, a bit hard to work with our hearts totally and we find it completely incomprehensible to work with our spirit- mainly because it requires a different mindset or rather one needs to train oneself to partner with the spirit at all times.

So how does one work with the spirit, you may ask?

Working with spirit requires a primary condition of having unquestioning faith and trust in the divine- of believing that whatever is meant for you will never go past you – that everything is a gift, however painful- of surrendering your will to the divine will and living in the moment without letting the past hurt or haunt you.

Yes, it’s not easy but then working from the state of ego all the time is neither easy as well. It’s fearful, second guesses your motives and leaves you unfulfilled.

When we practice forgiveness on a regular basis- not premature forgiveness, or superficial closure but deep- down- in- the- bones forgiveness which gushes out like a spring of freshwater  after anger has been released and tempered , do we actually begin to understand the true meaning of being alive .

When we live intensely in the present and stop looking at the future with rose tinted glasses or nurture unrealistic expectations from life, that’s when the spirit gets fully awakened and responds to our needs and wishes just the way it is required to, for our best and highest .

When you begin looking at your life with love rather than bitterness and doubt and fear, magic happens. It’s an attitude that needs to be cultivated and nourished.

The mind will offer you immense calculations and permutations to look at a situation or person in a practical, logical way but the spirit will quietly tell you what to do, what you need to do by shutting off what’s not essential for your growth. It will never confuse you or deceive you. It’s that voice which you can’t stop listening to, however hard you try to stifle it.

And once you learn to work with the spirit, you can direct the course of your own destiny and step out of your fate. Learn , unlearn, grow, unlearn- become a child again, become foolish, stop questioning why things happen as they do…just embrace , surrender and accept whatever is being gifted to you at the present moment. Let the spirit take you over.






The anatomy of broken-ness

A lot breaks when a marriage breaks and it’s not only dreams, hopes, desires, faith & trust, I feel it’s a lot more-it’s the breaking up of the little pieces of yourself that you have assembled over a period of time- that you have joined together to build up yourself- those tiny , unrecognizable , hollow spaces that you grew yourself into- those innumerable pieces you collaged yourself into over so many years- it’s almost a lifetime-it’s too many things that break or rather get lost-lost forever in the whirlpool of time- especially with kids around.

Attention breaks- things you would normally pay attention to, but you don’t because you can’t – the focus breaks, energy breaks- it dissipates and it’s not the same. Everyone in the family pays the price of this broken-ness. It’s sad but it’s true. There’s nothing one can do about it except make it less ugly, less discomforting, less painful, less dramatic- ah! and that’s not easy either. The price one pays cannot be quantified as less or more; worth it or not worth it because it is all subjective and depends on the journey you are on.

There’s nothing to guide you on this blind path except your inner guiding light and yes there are signposts- chaos, relief, peace, chaos, relief, pain, chaos, more pain, chaos, relief, pain, chaos, relief, pain, more pain, tiredness, chaos, pain, relief , clarity- these will keep alternating till you will know you have crossed the chasm of a broken marriage and walked ahead- with your sanity intact (hopefully); with well brought up kids – hoping that they have grown to be deeper, sensitive, humane souls who have soaked and learnt from your pain and the their own pain – and  that pain has irrigated the fecund soils of their souls to make it richer than ever-that nothing ever goes in vain- least of all pain when it is used to fuel everything inside and outside of you- when the pain is not discarded and rubbished as a curse but counted and revered as a blessing- that’s when every broken-ness rises like a phoenix to remind us that not all broken marriages are  knells of suffering and misery but most are harbingers of deep love and joy that awaits you at the other end of the chasm.


Being vulnerable is being strong.

Being vulnerable is being truly alive and anything else is being fake and stubborn and hiding our self from our own self – yet it’s an emotion few care to show to the ones they love & who matter and a fewer care to admit even to themselves – for once as women and (men) we have successfully mastered the so called art of being brave and strong – and of moving on in life in spite of heartbreaks with a straight face and our heads held high, being vulnerable is a feeling we lose touch with slowly – it’s an emotion we hide deep down in our hearts , locked away in some discarded part of our self which we are still holding on to – dreading to ever use or even look at in the eye – safe in the liberating thought : what’s out of sight is out of mind ( heart) – nothing is a bigger illusion than this – because to be truly human is to be vulnerable – to be truly authentic is to be vulnerable – vulnerability is a choice the soul makes on its path towards light – it’s one of the brightest lamp that illuminates our darkness leaving no room for delusions- for to confront and accept our vulnerability is to step closer to divinity and to our own selves – it’s the most potent way to be intensely and wholly alive – everything else is a mirage.
Don’t be fearful of your vulnerability – rather than using it to appear weak to others , use it to empower your soul and use it as a sickle to slash your way through the jungle of life and watch the path clear up – and behold the miracles all around you .


Waiting– that ever elusive feeling which houses in every soul and yet which means different things to different people. Why do we wait in the first place – for things to happen- for life to change- for desires to bloom, for love to arrive at our doorstep- for life to change, for time to fly, for dreams to come true…ah! the list is endless and the agony of waiting is perhaps worse than the pain of living through it all without any agendas or power struggles- or to put it succinctly, live in the moment- without getting anxious about the next moment- without carrying the load of past and being stuck in it- for to learn to live in the present is an acquired art- a precious skill – a muscle that strengthens with more use and yet its easier said than done- we as humans are brilliant at complicating things- our minds and ego have a job to do and we fuel them endlessly by listening to them even when we need to ignore them- because that’s what we are taught as a culture, as a society- to listen to our minds- to be sane and practical- to follow the norm , to merge and be a part of this rat race – to keep aspiring and craving for something new or better- a better job, a new car, a bigger house, a perfect lover, an excellent husband, a caring & dutiful wife- and we wait.

But waiting as the dictionary defines it is- to remain inactive or in a state of repose, as until something expected happens (often followed by for, till, or until): and therein lies its paradox- to be inactive is to be dead in your tracks- its like expecting the providence to move to conform to your wishes and demands – its being in a state of inertia and delusion, hoping the universe is planning a huge party for you soon- you may argue isn’t that what surrender is about- but surrender is a far greater act of divinity than waiting- waiting has an agenda attached to it – we wait FOR something to happen, we wait TO acquire something, we wait TO forgive, be forgiven, to love, to be loved, to live, to enjoy, to do this or that and the moment we begin to expect and hope for things to happen to us in a certain way, we have moved away from our highest self.

Surrender is letting go of all those hopes and expectations and going down on our knees to look heavenwards and utter- LET IT BE YOUR WILL LORD- and that requires greater courage, more patience, unwavering faith & trust and living intensely in the present moment – it requires greater soul stamina and more maturity- So the next time you find yourself waiting for a miracle to happen, release yourself from that trap because magic doesn’t happen when you wait but when you completely, truly, fully and unconditionally surrender- its only then that you get out of your own way and make way for the providence to move.


Man- Woman connection

A man- woman relationship is the most complex, layered, deep and fragile connection that can possibly happen between humans – it meanders from friendship to love sometimes and love to friendship at other times – it can go from familiarity to being strangers – from being warm to cold and warm again or hot or lukewarm – it can find it’s home deep down in silence or remain unfinished yet complete even when all words have been uttered – it can border on sensuality and attraction – in that danger zone of seduction where one step ahead can deepen the bond or freeze the relationship at that point for the rest of your life or make it even more precious and fragile or maybe suck out its illusion – who knows and how can one know what has yet to be experienced or one dreads to experience – for a man- woman connection is the most dynamic of all-

And I exclude marriages here – marriages are predictable and can border on boredom if the dynamic of a marriage is not regularly challenged – for what makes a marriage thrive is what kills it as well – a man – woman relationship can achieve unparalleled beauty & tenderness and great depths of love simply by being itself – by being nameless – by the sheer courage of not defining the relationship – by not feeling the need to flaunt its beauty to anyone – by not calling it any name approved by society – for what’s too exquisite can never be trapped inside the soul of a few words – never – it can only be felt and inhaled and lived .

And to be able to experience such relationships require a different attitude and mindset – it requires you to listen from the soul – it requires you to be true and authentic to your own desires and most importantly it requires you to open your heart and never close it again – to be vulnerable to the core and never fear pain again .

Its all about being authentic

And the most important and cardinal lesson to teach our kids is how to be authentic and real – especially in today’s world – how to be honest and brave and show courage even when it’s the hardest path to follow- for in a world full of insane temptations and insaner choices , it’s so easy to get lost and yet it’s only when the kids are grounded and rooted in their authenticity and values, can they find their way through without prostituting their freedom and values and NOT selling their souls for safety & security – it all begins with healthy & good parenting – of learning and unlearning as a parent and becoming more conscious and fearless and free of your own illusions as a mother or father – for only when you are authentic, can you raise an authentic son or daughter and can we all make this world more real & truthful , more full of compassion and kindness – for love is always the answer and the first step to love & be loving is to be authentic – how authentic are you as a man, woman, mother , father , son, daughter, employee or employer or are you aware when you are not being authentic – think hard 🙂